Thursday, September 02, 2004

Eternal Questions!

As anyone who's read my profile here already knows, I'm a fan of Eternal Questions. They're not quite a hobby of mine, but they're close, lol.

For those who might not know, Eternal Questions are humorously(-intended) questions that point out one or more of the absurdities, inconsistencies, or contradictions of our everyday life and speech. Examples include:

"Why do we drive on the parkway and park on the driveway?"

"Why does 'sour cream' have an expiration date?"

"Why do 'fat chance' and 'slim chance' mean the same thing?"

The object of Eternal Questions is NOT to reply to them with an answer! It's to acknowledge and perhaps ponder or reflect upon the absurdity, inconsistency, or contradiction they reveal. In other words, if you respond to(the Eternal Question of) "What makes the Teflon stick to the pan?" by saying "Covalent bonds", you DON'T get it!

I've always wanted an all-inclusive, quasi-exhaustive list of Eternal Questions. But I've never seen or made one before. So, I've decided that this blog entry of mine - and the replies and comments to it - will be(come) that list!

So, please feel free to respond to this post with any Eternal Question(s) that aren't already a part of this post or it's prior comments/replies. All I ask is that we keep the topics and terminology of all submissions "family-friendly" and let's steer clear of religion and politics too. However, it is NOT a requirement that all submissions be "PC". ;)

I'd list a few more Eternal Questions here. And I'm sure I'll respond to this with more when I remember them. But right now the only one I can think of that's not already a part of this post is:

"When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?"


At 10:10 PM, Blogger Mick W said...

Is U2 a "Christian" band or not?

There's one about rest rooms and living rooms I just can't pull out of my hat.

At 8:57 AM, Blogger Jeff D said...

I'm not familiar with the restroom/living room one. But the thought occurs to me that it might be akin to the driveway/parkway one, as in:

"Why do we rest in the living room but/and live in the restroom?"

I don't think that's it(and I hope it isn't, lol), but who knows?

And I almost "broke my rule" and gave my answer to the U2 one! ;)

At 8:33 PM, Blogger little miss said...

Why do we want to "sleep like a baby"? Baby's sleep is interupted, restless, and fitfull!

Ok...that was a stretch.

At 3:24 PM, Blogger Jeff D said...

Maybe it was a stretch, but I like it!

So, THANKS for adding it to the list!

At 4:33 PM, Blogger Jeff D said...

Why do we call it a "hot water heater"?

HOT water doesn't need heating!

At 11:43 AM, Blogger Mick W said...

I remembered another eternal one-

Why do we park on the driveway and drive on the parkway?

At 2:43 PM, Blogger Jeff D said...

Why are there Braille instructions on drive-thru ATMs?

At 9:29 PM, Blogger Jeff D said...

What's another word for "thesaurus"?


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